sixgunsound: (brain jar)
sixgunsound ([personal profile] sixgunsound) wrote2011-05-15 02:37 pm

So I decided to shut up about being bored and read one of the many (MANY MANY MANY)...

...books I've accumulated over the last three years [Cross-Posted from Tumblr]

One thing everyone needs to realize about college is that it is a LIFE EATER. I have not had time to sit down and read for THREE YEARS. THREE WHOLE YEARS. I used to read three books a week.

I never realized how much I missed it. Instead of reading fanfiction, where I know the characters and know that I should care about them, and they are just being shuffled from plot to plot to plot, I have new characters to learn about, and make decisions about and it's so damn amazing that I kind of want to cry and then beat myself to death for letting go of this.

For a long, long time books were all that kept me going. When I was sad I'd immerse myself in a fantasy world (firmly entrenching my habit of escapism) and live there until I couldn't anymore. And the sadness never went away (nor will it, I've come to accept) but I didn't have to deal with it. The past three years I've constantly had to deal with it, because I didn't do anything else. I read fic all the time because it was on the computer and that meant I could be studying. I was/am constantly thinking about studying. Even when I'm not studying I have this impending sense of doom that I need to be learning new material. (College is a life killer.)

And I know that probably no one has read my tiny ode to books and all things literary, but I'm just so...happy. I'm actually tearing up a little. It's ridiculous. But there you go.

CROSS-POSTING FROM TUMBLR, WHY DO YOU FUCK UP MY FORMAT SO MUCH?

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